Take The Corners Slowly

Olympic skiers reminded me of an important life lesson this week. Watching a couple of ski contestants fly off the track failing to make a tight corner at the bottom of a hill got me thinking. Its not the straight stretches that get you, its the corners. 

I have been negotiating one of life's corners this week. My father died. We held a funeral, placed his ashes, mourned with family and friends, reminisced, laughed and cried. And the important point is this, we did it all with a certain care that required time and attention.

Like you, my life is full. I like to go down hill fast. I have lots in my diary and people are expecting me to fulfil various expectations. Sometimes I don't have enough margin.

But on this occasion my dearest friends counselled me to slow down and take the corner well. Slowing down meant flying to Canada. It involved visiting friends, talking through details, and listening to family members unhurriedly, attentively and lovingly. 

Another thing I learned is that you should look where you want to go. This is great advice when ploughing through a corner in life. Don't get obsessed with the stuff in front of you or that is where you will fall. To paraphrase Paul, "Ski by faith". This week I have been looking towards our eternal hope in Jesus Christ. The promises of 1 Thess. 4:13-18 have never seemed so important to me. I'm navigating a corner of grief with my eyes on the prize of resurrection.

Life presents many corners. Grief is a corner. Loss is a corner. New love is a corner. Deep disappointment is corner. Huge opportunity is a corner. 

To win gold, take the corners wisely. Slow down and lean into God. 

How To Say Clever Things

Monday was Martin Luther King Jr. Day. The social media was full of awesome quotes and clever things he said. Here are a few examples: 

"Change does not roll in on the wheels of inevitability, but comes through continuous struggle." 

"I have decided to stick with love. Hate is too great a burden to bare." 

"Faith is taking the first step even when you don't see the whole staircase." 

"Our lives begin to end the day we become silent about things that matter."

"We must learn to live together as brothers or perish together as fools."

How is it that he said so many clever things? Well, he was smart. He had a heap of public opportunities. His daddy was a Baptist preacher and he followed the same path. He was a precocious student. He quoted others a lot. He thought deeply and wrote extensively.  

All true. However, the real reason is more powerful. The things he said sound clever because the life he lived was great. Bold sacrificial choices and an untimely death turned ordinary words into quotable gems. 

A sure way to sound naive and awkward is to try and be clever. But the quickest way to become clever is to give your life away in service to others. Live a bold sacrificial life, die doing something that matters, and suddenly your ordinary words are supercharged with wisdom. It turns out that wisdom is more of a "doing-thing" than a "saying-thing".

So, how do you say clever things? Speak less and make greater sacrifices. (Prov. 17:28)

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Listen to the closing moments of King's final speech ("the mountain top") the night before he was assassinated: click here. 

An interesting fact: King was born Michael King, Jr. His father changed the name to Martin Luther while attending the Baptist World Alliance Congress in Berlin in 1934. The vision for greatness stuck!

God of New Beginnings

January is named after the Roman god Janus. He has a pair of faces. One looks backward and one looks forward. What a great symbol of New Years Wisdom. 

Look back. What are you celebrating as you close off your 2013? What stirs you to offer prayers of thanksgiving? Are there successes? Gains? Wins? And what about disappointments? Losses? Hurts? What loose ends do you need to tie up so 2013 can rest well? 

Look forward. What positive change should you promise to make? Is it fitness, family, faith, fun-times, finances. Do you need to get organised, read your bible, sign up to serve or learn a new skill? 

Did you know that you are 10 times more likely to succeed with a promise made at New Years? So says Dr. Mike Evans in this 6 min video. It helped me as I set 8 rather exciting personal goals for 2014. I hope it helps you too. 

A simple word of wisdom. Don't make a resolution, make a plan! Think it through, break it up into little pieces, write it down, be accountable to someone, and invite the God of new beginnings to help you. Not Janus ... Jehovah! (Isa. 43:9)

The Rarest Kind of Friendship

There is a friendship based on talking. It is common. Dale Carnegie says you can "win" these sort of friends. All you need to do is let them speak. So long as you nod and mumble with credible frequency you can assemble a substantial collection of these sort of friends. 

This common friendship is epidermal. Surface conversations rubbing up against each other, with very little permeation. People taking turns to speak, but no one taking time to listen. 

The rarest kind of friendship however, behaves differently. It does not wait its turn to speak. Sometimes it yields its turn and sits in silence for long periods. At other times it interrupts brusquely and speaks its mind. It does this because it is engaged, it understands, participates and even anticipates. In short it loves.

This is friendship based on active hearing! It is sacred because it sees into your soul and speaks wisdom, comfort and truth to what it sees there. 

I am blessed. I have friends who occasionally touch my soul. Their words are kisses and their eyes sing my undeserved praises. They "get" me without making me explain myself. They can rebuke me or bless me but always I feel restful and improved when I have been with them. Jesus himself is one such friend, he touches my soul frequently (John 15:15). 

I think I understand the goal (Prov. 17:17, 18:24, 27:6,9). I wish I did not fail so often. I pray that I might be a soul-touching friend for a few people at least some of the time as I live. And I pray that you would have such a friend and be such a friend too.

Who or what touches your soul? How do you practice deep friendship? Please leave a comment. 

Ponder Your Life Mission Today

What is your life mission? Over 25 years ago I wrote out my life purpose. I review it each new year. It inspires me to become a better person. It has changed only a little over the years. 

I share it here to encourage you to write out your mission. You'll see I have lots of work yet to do. Share your thoughts on life mission below.  

My chief aim in life is to honour God and live so as to hear him say: "Well done, good and faithful servant".

I am a Christian! I will live for Christ! I will ask: "What would Jesus do?" I will seek first God's Kingdom.

I will aim to make Christ visible in the world, to be a servant and a leader who will bring people into the Christian life and help them live it. I will make disciples.

I will model Christ's love in my marriage. I will raise my children to honour and serve Christ and to exercise their freedom to reach their full potential.

I will maintain a positive attitude and learn to live by faith. I will learn to rejoice in everything and be thankful. I will be a positive influence on people.

I will place the highest value on: humility, integrity, love, creativity, grace, listening, service and charity.

I will seek to live at peace with others.

I will take the bible as my rule of faith and practice in life. I will embrace the Ten Commandments, The Fruit of the Spirit, and The Golden Rule.

I am committed to personal growth and new challenges. I am free to fail and eager to learn from each failure.

I am a communicator and will use my gift and talent to its greatest possible benefit as a preacher, teacher, pastor and author.

Take some time at the start of a new year to think about your mission. Your life matters. It is a gift to all of us. Enjoy it and live it well. Happy New Year!