I Don’t Want to Suffer for Jesus

Acts 5:41

“The apostles left the Sanhedrin, rejoicing because they had been counted worthy of suffering disgrace for the Name.”

I want to obey Jesus. I want to be bold in witness just like the apostles. But I do not WANT to suffer. Does that make me a weak follower of Jesus?

I think not. I think it makes me normal. And that is exactly what this story is about (Acts 5:17-42).

Insight: this is not an exhortation it is a testimony. Acts 5 doesn’t say “Allan, be like this”, it says “Allan, look at this”. There is a big difference.

Exhortation: Allan, be like this!

On my first reading of this verse I thought, “I don’t qualify? I am not worthy like these great saints?” When I try to predict my response to suffering, I worry. “Can I suffer and then rejoice so freely?” To be honest, I’m not sure. The question even makes me feel a little guilty because I just plain don’t want to suffer.

Testimony: Allan, look at this!

There is a better way to read this. Nowhere in verse 41 does it say: “Copy this.” What it actually implies is more like: “This is what happened, can you believe it!”

God made the moment of suffering something unexpectedly good. The credit goes to God, not the apostles! The apostles did not bring joy with them to their day of torture. God gave it to them in the moment. God transformed their experience of suffering. It was a miracle.

I believe this story is in the Bible to encourage people like me who don’t want to suffer. The question for me is not, “Does Allan pre-qualify for suffering?” God knows, I fail. The right question is: “Will Allan stand up and trust God when the moment comes?”

This story helps me say: “Yes!” It helps me trust God not people (Acts 5:29).

Nothing here makes we “want” suffering. But the story does make me less afraid of pain. God transforms suffering itself and I trust him. If I can take the apostles at their word, the pain that I fear, won’t be what I fear. When I suffer “disgrace for the Name” I will actually feel elevated, joy-filled and connected with God’s purpose in an amazing way.

I have already experienced this. My pain is very small compared to the apostles, but I know exactly what they are saying. It is a privilege to suffer for Jesus. I don’t want suffering, but I don’t fear it either!

The apostles’ experience does not judge me, it empowers me. It is not an “exhortation” it is a “testimony”. God transformed their suffering into joy and he will do the same for me. The apostles are not better than me, they just went before me. Will I follow? Their testimony gives me confidence to say “Yes!”

Post Script

I might point out that Jesus didn't want to suffer either (Mark 14:36)! And when he did suffer, God transformed it in the most amazing way.

Questions

What have you learned about suffering for Jesus? 

Have you experienced suffering for him as a privilege and a joy?