“If he sins against you seven times in a day, and seven times comes back to you and says, ‘I repent’, forgive him.” The Apostles said to the Lord, “Increase our faith!”
The principle at work here is abundance. God’s way is to lavish us with kindness. He does not count our sins but rather erases them. Our forgiveness towards other people is meant to mirror God’s grace. The number of times is not the point, our attitude is. God invites us to practice extravagant forgiveness.
I make five observations on forgiving someone who sins against you repeatedly.
1. Be straight with your critique. The verse just before this one says: “If your brother sins, rebuke him, if he repents forgive him” (Lk. 17:3). You have a mandate to confront the wrong. The goal of forgiveness is renewed relationship and changed behaviour. Rebuke cannot be overlooked in the cycle of forgiveness. And often rebuke will take forms that ensure abuses do not continue. Forgiveness is not a license for ever deepening sinful behaviour. Extravagant forgiveness is the path to life.
2. Ask God for supernatural capacity. You can’t forgive like Jesus wants you to in your own human strength. You really need God’s help. I think that is why the disciples respond immediately with: “Increase our faith!” (Lk. 17:5) I feel the same need. I need God's Spirit to help me and Jesus' cross to inspire me in order to forgive like this.
3. It is OK to be exasperated with the situation. Jesus certainly was (Mk. 3:5, 8:12). He repeatedly showed emotion when those around him were hardhearted and unchanging in their ways. Don’t let that exasperation lead you to sin. But don't pretend forgiveness is easy either.
4. Adopt the posture of a servant. Think of each offer of forgiveness as an act of obedience to God. If I am a bond-slave of Jesus, in a sense, my offer of forgiveness is no more than a days work for my Master. I am just doing my duty (Lk. 17:7-10). Best not to count the cycles of forgiveness. I think 7 times (and elsewhere 77 times, Mt. 18:2) means “again and again”, the same way a servant would attend to his chores.
5. Believe that God will not ask us to bear more than we can endure. We usually want to set a limit on our forgiveness. God asks us to be open ended with our patience and love. He knows this is how healing occurs, slowly. We fear this approach because we think we won’t be able to endure or we reject it because it seems unfair. God knows better. And, he promises not to abandon us.
Forgiveness is hard work. It is servant's work. Its purpose is to make new people out of broken ones and it requires supernatural capacity. O Lord, increase our faith!
Questions
- Why is this kind of forgiveness so hard?
- What would you add to this list of insights about forgiving others?
- Please leave a comment.
Tweet |
No comments:
Post a Comment